maybe ex’s aren’t crazy

The ex is not really crazy. They are honestly the ones to feel bad for. In a relationship when one of the partners cheats and then either ends the relationship or the other party ends it due to the lack of trust remaining. The ex is the one that did not betray the simpliest principle of a relationship to remain loyal to their partner. Or to put this more simply to only be romantically involved with them! 

The cheater moves on with his new flame while the ex is left in the dust with no one to help pick up the pieces of the relationship that they didn’t think was headed to this. The ex was blindsided and lost their partner, their confident, and their best friend all at once. That’s a huge loss and it’s going to take time and lots of coping to get over. They aren’t crazy when they express how upset they are or text their ex. They are in a fragile state from having everything they thought was the one given thing in their life that wasn’t going to change/ that they’d never lose to being shut out and left behind. 

I’m not saying an ex should harass and stalk their old partner. I’m saying maybe we should stop demonizing the ex as a whole and try to understand how mentally challenging this is for them. I know for me as soon as the texts went from still compassionate and my person to distant and sparse I was confused and heartbroken. He was always there to pick me up when I was down, to make everything okay once again. I absolutely texted him too much, but it was the magnitude that I did for two years and a weird habit to break. We were very similar so it was hard hearing a new song and not being allowed to send it to him. I never aimed to disrespect the new arrangement between him and his new involvement but I just missed my best friend. Since I have coped and healed but it took a little while after a month of crying, ice cream, and hiding in my room. I luckily had the time and strength to heal myself. But for my other friends, please be more kind towards your discarded partner because it really does hurt and take a lot of courage to heal yourself alone.

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I am just a normal girl writing her experiences and bits of wisdom she's come across through her journey to loving herself and positivity.

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