He placed a napkin over my chest right over the spot that contained my heart
He then proceeded to raise his leg and stamped down as hard as possible
He crushed my heart
And the worst part was he left the fragments scattered around the bare floor
He made sure that he did not leave even a trace of this act
He then proceeded to walk away without looking back
I lay there I’m despair left with only a glimmer of hope that I have the ability to collect all the fragments on my own and piece my heart back together just as it once was
I fear I won’t be able to repair it perfectly
I fear that when I put it back together the scar will be too deep and the heart will never be able to confidently beat once more
I fear the loss of my ability to have faith in others
to believe promises to fully immerse myself in another’s existence
I fear I will never be able to love the way I once could
Life is no longer a fairy tale romance but rather a dark hallway of broken, troubled hearts attached to husks of their former greatness just trying to heal their souls
He threw me away like the trash goes out on Tuesday nights
Except he was so eager to be rid of this weeks trash that he personally transported it to the dump so there would be no evidence linking him to the decrepit and rotting pile of trash he created while being able to walk away without a smudge on his way to start collecting new shiny items that will slowly suffer the same, lonely demise.
It does get better than these feelings of no hope and despair. Just two months later I am absolutely full of light and happiness. My chest no longer feels like a weight too heavy to bear has been thrown carelessly on it. I now make my own happiness, I now am my own happiness.
Do not let another dare define what or what you are not worth. Your value isn’t determined based on how other people see you. You’re extremely valuable for you are you. Be gentle with yourself while healing it’ll hurt like hell but that hurt turns into strength. That strength is yours and yours alone. You created that strength and you endured all but what you deserved. You are worth so much more and I hope you come to that realization just as I did.